Grief support groups, condolence advice, funeral etiquette and more
A place for people who are going through loss to support one another .
Latest Activity: on Monday
Started by Casey May 3.
Started by Holly Marie. Last reply by Cynthia M Stone Mar 15.
Started by amber casey Dec 16, 2012.
The past year has been hell. My grandfather passed in May 2012 very suddenly. In October, I (an avid runner and athlete) tore my ACL and had reconstructive surgery.
On December 23, 2013, my baby brother shot and killed himself (after a history of depression and a benign, but unremoveable brain tumor a year and a half before that required numerous operations and a painful shunt) while the rest of my family was visiting me several states away. He was only 25.
A month ago, my grandmother passed away. I think the grief was just too much for her.
I can't function any more. I can't run away the pain as my knee is still healing. I am gaining weight and am pushing people away. I know I couldn't have stopped him from killing himself, but I feel so guilty that he died alone. I wish I had done more or been there for him. I wish I had called. I wish he was still here.
I am sleep walking through life. I am young and was once vivacious and excited. Now, I am just an empty, guilty shell of a person. How do I make this stop?
I have lost 5 of my siblings since the end of September. I am the youngest of 12. Three had passed away before this in 2006, 2008 and 2010. There are only four of us left. My sister Eileen passed away the end of Sept last year. My brother George on Thanksgiving, my sister Marie four days before Christmas. My sister Gerri was diagnosed with secondary stage four brain cancer in Oct and she passed away Feb 3rd. She had 7 tumors in her brain. My brother Billy was was found deceased in his apt on April 22. The last two were the closest to me in age, so I grew upwith them. This is way too much. I loved them all dearly and miss them so much. Mybrother Billy was deaf. I hadn't seen him in about 7 years and I regret I was not able to go see him before he passed away. I am a positive person and I know they are all in a better place now. It is just hard to wrap my head around the fact that they are gone. 5 deaths in 7 months is a lot to digest. Except for the last two the rest were all older and had their share of health problems. My sister Gerri was never sick until Oct. She was three years older than me. My brother Billy was two years older than me. He had some ups and downs with health due to heart and diabetes. I guess it all came to much. I have had my share of health problems but I am doing good. I can only hope I stay this way. I have a lot of nieces and nephews and have been making it an effort in the last 5 years to keep in touch with all of them. I try to keep my sisters and brothers spirits alive. they will always have a place in my heart. Some days it just is too much to bear though as I hear of another one of my siblings passing away.
I lost my sister two months ago on February 27, 2013. She died suddenly, and we really don't know what she died from. She was bipolar so had many ups and downs in her life. I loved her dearly in spite of her getting very angry at me when I least expected her anger. I always had to remind myself that her anger was part of her illness. Before and even when she became sick with bipolar, we were very close and had such incredibly fun times together. I miss her soooo much and want to call her but can't. I have this huge hole in my heart that doesn't seem to go away. My energy level is low which is hard for me because I'm used to having tons of energy. I am not sleeping well and am just very sad. I would love to go to a sibling loss support group in Denver but cannot find one. Does anyone know of a support group ifor sibling loss n the Denver area? How long will I feel this awful? What simple steps can I take to start feeling better?
I am from a family of four children. My only brother died years ago from alcoholism, my older sister is in a nursing home and is no help to talk about our sister. Even though she has been told about our younger sister, she doesn't respond so we don't know how much she understands. I am the only one left who is functioning so I feel much like an orphan. I need help to cope with the loss of my sister.
Any comments are much appreciated.
I have been avoiding anything that reminds me of my little brother lately. It hurts and I guess I kinda felt the if I ignored the fact that i'm in pain it would just go away. My other 3 siblings don't seem to be able to talk about it with me and my feelings have been very personal about it. Being that my family has very strong beliefs about death, no matter the cause I feel as if i'm the odd one out. I'm not angry with him for hos choice, like our other brother is, i'm just filled with so much pain that he is not here with us anymore. Being that I was ONLY sibling to not see him in resent months before. The others saw him the night before he died. We were in no way on bad terms, I just lived 600 miles away from everyone and was in a different stage of my life than the rest of my siblings. I often wonder if I had been there that last family dinner, if I would have been able to see how much he was hurting. I know that i'll never actually know, but the thought keeps crossing my mind. The last conversation that we had was on Facebook and that also haunts me....It has not been a year yet and i'm so fearful of June 22nd this year! He was in my eyes the brother that had it all together when the rest of us were struggling. How odd that seems now, when he was hurting more than any of us could see. I finally in some ways can admit that he is really "gone" No matter the pain it has caused I know that he never wanted us to be hurt, he just wanted to stop hurting inside...I can respect that, just not understand it really...I miss you Michael!!
Have not been close wtih my sister since My Mom passed away. She also treated my kids very bad at the funeral. I Have forgiven her.. However we will never be close again. It is What it is. Don't know her motive and it hurts. But I have to go on and the way to do that is to forgive and forget.
Hello Sarah! I am very sorry about the loss of your brother. It had been very hard on your mom and yourself. I am also so sorry to hear how his children are treating you. You loved your brother very much and have suffered a great loss and their behavior is unfair. It is a hard road and to have the added pain they are causing is not right for you. I am very sorry. You brother, your mother and you are in my thoughts.
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