Q. My father died recently, but I did not learn of his death until weeks after the funeral. He lived with his second wife, who caused a family rift after their marriage, and kept me out of the loop. (I live halfway across the country.) I feel angry and bereft at the same time. Are there any words of comfort you can offer? Also there is no head stone at the grave. Can I put one up?A. I can’t imagi…