dear adams mom, i,m so sorry for your loss, as a mom who lost her first born at 17 to suicide, i do know your pain. as i have other children and grandchildren too, but i always am thinking of my ben, and what would of been, had he lived. i think somedays what would his children be like, what would his life now at 31 be like, but i also know, god takes care of our babies, and it,s not goodbye, it,s just see ya round the bend, it may take years before you see him again, but you will!! see him again. even after 13 years, the pain is still there, the nightmares, but i also know that i have to live for my kids and grandchildren, they deserve us, they love us, and we have to hold strong if not for our own sanity, for the sake of theres. it,s not an easy thing to do, hold tight to your memories, hold him in your heart, where no one else can go, and do what your doing hun, reaching out, talking about it with people that understand exactly what your going through, and how you feel. godbless, i,ll keep you in my prayers.