"My wife of 26 years died almost 4 years ago of colon cancer. I am still having a difficult time. I have lost interest in doing anything productive or enjoyable. I cry regularly. However, I've come to understand that crying can be therapeutic so…"
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Sorting Through Your Spouse's Belongings
Q. My husband died 10 months ago and I still haven’t cleared out his closet and bureau. I can’t say when I’ll be ready to do it, but it certainly isn’t now. Is there something wrong with me? Also, what do I do with his belongings when I am ready? A bewildering number of tasks fall on a widow’s shoulders, but one of the most daunting is emptying your mate’s drawers and disposing of his clothes and other personal effects. I know of one widow who tackled the job a month or two after the…See More
Sorting Through Your Spouse's Belongings
Q. My husband died 10 months ago and I still haven’t cleared out his closet and bureau. I can’t say when I’ll be ready to do it, but it certainly isn’t now. Is there something wrong with me? Also, what do I do with his belongings when I am ready? A bewildering number of tasks fall on a widow’s shoulders, but one of the most daunting is emptying your mate’s drawers and disposing of his clothes and other personal effects. I know of one widow who tackled the job a month or two after the…See More
Handling Insensitive Remarks: Advice for Widows
Q. How can you respond to people who say dumb things to you after your husband has died? A woman I barely know called two days after I was widowed and said, “Don’t worry. You’re going to be just fine.” I felt so angry at her. How could she possibly know what I was going through and what my life ahead would be like? I just bit my tongue and said nothing, but it’s aggravated me ever since. Is there a better way to cope with such statements? I think you handled your initial reaction well. But…See More
Handling Insensitive Remarks: Advice for Widows
Q. How can you respond to people who say dumb things to you after your husband has died? A woman I barely know called two days after I was widowed and said, “Don’t worry. You’re going to be just fine.” I felt so angry at her. How could she possibly know what I was going through and what my life ahead would be like? I just bit my tongue and said nothing, but it’s aggravated me ever since. Is there a better way to cope with such statements? I think you handled your initial reaction well. But…See More
Widow at a Party
Q. I’m invited to a big party and have mixed feelings about attending. Part of me wants to attend, but I’m also afraid I won’t fit in. My husband died four months ago and this is my first big social event that isn’t strictly family. I’m worried about what to say and whether to mention that I’m a widow. Any suggestions? You’re…See More
Widow at a Party
Q. I’m invited to a big party and have mixed feelings about attending. Part of me wants to attend, but I’m also afraid I won’t fit in. My husband died four months ago and this is my first big social event that isn’t strictly family. I’m worried about what to say and whether to mention that I’m a widow. Any suggestions? You’re…See More
Selling the House After Your Spouse Dies
Q. I’m thinking about selling my house, but I’ve heard that a widow should wait a year before doing so. Why is that time frame important? After your mate dies, you’re likely to be numb, in shock, and barely able to put one foot in front of the other. This state gradually begins to ease for most of us, but it isn’t a straight line. There are setbacks and flare-ups. It can take a…See More
Selling the House After Your Spouse Dies
Q. I’m thinking about selling my house, but I’ve heard that a widow should wait a year before doing so. Why is that time frame important? After your mate dies, you’re likely to be numb, in shock, and barely able to put one foot in front of the other. This state gradually begins to ease for most of us, but it isn’t a straight line. There are setbacks and flare-ups. It can take a…See More
MEG Amelia commented on Florence Isaacs's blog post Health Concerns for Widows"Also, check out www.bikramyoga.com it has helped me keep my mind and body fit."
MEG Amelia commented on Florence Isaacs's blog post Health Concerns for Widows"Find support groups and keep busy too, depression is another risk factor."
Health Concerns for Widows
Q. I’ve heard that a woman’s risk for health problems increases after her husband dies. I didn’t know that. What are the most important issues I should be aware of as a widow? Many studies show that losing your mate affects your own health. Most recently, a 2011 study at the University of Pennsylvania Population Studies Center found that widows had a 47% higher mortality rate than married women…See More
Widow in the World
By Florence Isaacs
Florence Isaacs is a freelance journalist and author whose books include My Deepest Sympathies, When the Man You Love Is Ill and Just a Note to Say...The Perfect Words for Every Occasion.
In her new monthly blog for LegacyConnect, Florence – a widow herself – offers advice to bereaved spouses and partners. Widow in the World is Florence's second blog for LegacyConnect. She also writes Sincere Condolences in which she offers tips on writing thoughtful sympathy notes and answers questions about condolence and eulogy writing, funeral etiquette and more.
If you have a question for Florence, please email her at fisaacs@florenceisaacs.com.
Florence Isaacs's Blog
Sorting Through Your Spouse's Belongings
Posted on April 25, 2013 at 10:30am 0 Comments 1 Like
Q. My husband died 10 months ago and I still haven’t cleared out his closet and bureau. I can’t say when I’ll be ready to do it, but it certainly isn’t now. Is there something wrong with me? Also, what do I do with his belongings when I am ready?
A bewildering number of tasks fall on a widow’s shoulders, but one of the most daunting is emptying your mate’s drawers and disposing of his clothes and other personal effects. I know of one widow who tackled the…
ContinueHandling Insensitive Remarks: Advice for Widows
Posted on March 22, 2013 at 10:35am 0 Comments 0 Likes
Q. How can you respond to people who say dumb things to you after your husband has died? A woman I barely know called two days after I was widowed and said, “Don’t worry. You’re going to be just fine.” I felt so angry at her. How could she possibly know what I was going through and what my life ahead would be like? I just bit my tongue and said nothing, but it’s aggravated me ever since. Is there a better way to cope with such statements?
I think you…
ContinueWidow at a Party
Posted on February 12, 2013 at 9:00am 0 Comments 2 Likes
Q. I’m invited to a big party and have mixed feelings about attending. Part of me wants to attend, but I’m also afraid I won’t fit in. My husband died four months ago and this is my first big social event that isn’t strictly family. I’m worried about what to say and whether to mention that I’m a widow. Any…
Selling the House After Your Spouse Dies
Posted on January 21, 2013 at 11:00am 0 Comments 0 Likes
Q. I’m thinking about selling my house, but I’ve heard that a widow should wait a year before doing so. Why is that time frame important?
After your mate dies, you’re likely to be numb, in shock, and barely able to put one foot in front of the other. This state gradually begins to ease for most of us, but it isn’t a straight line. There are…
ContinueComment Wall (1 comment)
- At 4:55pm on May 11, 2013,
Charles Gollott said… - My wife of 26 years died almost 4 years ago of colon cancer. I am still having a difficult time. I have lost interest in doing anything productive or enjoyable. I cry regularly. However, I've come to understand that crying can be therapeutic so that doesn't bother me as much as it once did. I have a couple of rooms in the house that I have allowed to become very cluttered and in need of cleaning out. The desire is there to do these tasks but I just can't seem to get up and get started. In my defense, I have a disability which makes it difficult. I am not able financially to pay someone to come in and help me. I feel like I'm caught between the rock and the hard place. Do you or anyone else reading this have any ideas of help?
Charles Gollott
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