"Christopher, you will continue to continuously miss her, My Wife of 31yrs passed 18 months ago, I think of her constantly...I've been around the block more than a few times, and thought I was stronger, I was wrong. They say I will find…"
"My Wife passed six months past what the Doctors said and those six months were quality. I was very grateful. There was nothing left unsaid there was no question in her mind, our kids minds, or mine the love we all had for each other. And thats what…"
"Three weeks is no amount of time, it was months before I was able to control my emotions. Much less make any of rational decisions, so I just held off making any decisions for over a year. I would think that they, as well as yourself, should hold…"
"Its been a little over a year that my sweet Little Wife was called home, it doesn't get any easier at least for me it doesn't. We were married for 31 yrs, I have a tendacy to do things alone I don't want to rain on anyones…"
"Hello all come the 11th of October it will be a year since my sweet little Wifes passing, its been the hardest year of my life, I'm not feeling anything right now, not really now how to explain it...I suppose numb is the closest I can come to…"
"Jerry I was thinking the same thoughts the other day, it seems like everything in my life is going wrong since my Wife passed.Its been said the God won't give us anymore than we handle. I wish He didn't have so much confidence in my…"
"My Wife of 31 yrs passed 10 months ago, your not cold blooded different people handle things in different ways. When I would have a "good day" I'd feel guilty, thinking I shouldn't feel this good. But the next day would…"
I can relate I've had the same experiences, it was 10 months that my sweet Gail passed. I've had to replace our washer and dryer, and now I'm looking for another couch and love seat. All these things needed replacing…"
"My Son finished building the new motor, and along with a few friends installed it in the car, it has a few bugs in it to make it race ready, but the motivation is there it should be ready to go. And Daughter has drug out her drivers fire suit that…"
"Thankyou for your replies, Vee your post made me tear up...I suppose I will be taking one of your suggestions Friday night. Like I stated we were/are a close family. One of the things that we've been doing as family is race cars at our local…"
I had my business for 20 years and many customers were more like friends. If Charlie were still with me, I would probably be missing some of them. I am really new ti this (7 weeks) but right now the business that I loved seems like nothing…"
"Julie I never thought of my business as being a reason for me getting up in the morning, it did when Gail was still with me, as we had so many things we wanted to do together upon our retirement. Those things are gone now, I still have our Motor…"
"Weekends and coming home after work is the roughest on me, its been almost 8 months for me/us. We have a small family business that I started opening up all day Saturdays, since Gails passing. Yesterday after work I was actually scared, two days…"
"Melanie thank you for your comment/post. We/I were more fortunate than a lot of others. By that I mean I got upset with the Drs. and went against them and brought my Wife home. After she came out of the drug induced coma. It took her about a week…"
"Hey John, Your feelings are on the grief roller coaster. With all its ups and downs and in betweens. Your post is filled with normal feelings and not that of a drinking person! I am 10 months into this and hate every minute of it.…"
I had my business for 20 years and many customers were more like friends. If Charlie were still with me, I would probably be missing some of them. I am really new ti this (7 weeks) but right now the business that I loved seems like nothing more than the thing that took away all the time I could have spent with him - maybe that will change. I have still been busy with it tying up loose ends and the building needs to be sold. I'm starting to see that something is going to have to fill the time.
Hey John, Your feelings are on the grief roller coaster. With all its ups and downs and in betweens. Your post is filled with normal feelings and not that of a drinking person! I am 10 months into this and hate every minute of it. I again have hit a very low point in my grieving process and I am having a hard time just getting out of bed but I do and I try to make the most of what that day will bring me. Life seems to be a challenge these days! Stay strong and eventually the coaster will turn to go back up the hill and you will be on the top again! Smiles, Jane P.
John, Death and grief seems to bring out the best in families. We are all struggling and trying to find ourselves within this new normal and since we are all drowning in the same boat it is hard to see through the waves. It is not that your wife who held it all together it was a good family unit that built a strong family. It was all of you working together to make it. But death and grief had weakened the structure and the foundation is cracking because no one is strong enough to hold it together. PLEASE try and attend grief counseling with your children or by yourself. But what is hurting so much inside is projecting the wrong message on the outside.
Talk civilly to your children and get it all out in the open. Talking seems to open many doors. You seem to have had a wonderful family to this point so love will prevail just give it time to work through it. But the longer nothing is said the deeper the wounds. I will pray for you and your family.
John, your new normal starts when you allow yourself to adjust. Adjusting to being alone is a very hard part of our grieving. I have no one, no children, no family and a few friends who live in a different state. My big fear is dying and no one finding my body for days. But I have to move forward and not look back because these are the cards I was delt and I have to play them. (Danny and I played cards all the time, at chemo, waiting for Dr. appointments, just sitting at home to pass time.)
Take what God has given you and make the most of it. Enjoy your children your grandchildren, your business or just take your dogs for a walk! It is a baby step process but somehow we adjust and make it to another day because like it or not tomorrow always comes. This is the hardest road we ever had to walk down and we have to do it alone but we seem to make it with help from our friends,even if it is a post here or keeping ourselves busy in work we seem to make it. I will pray for you. Hugs, Jane P.