All Blog Posts (2,819)

Lost my mom and then my boyfriend 17 days later to suicide.

Hi everyone.  

I have read many of your stories and am amazed at the strength many of you have despite your losses.  Some of your stories are so tragic and my heart grieves for you as well.  My mom had Alzheimer's and she was diagnosed with colon cancer early last year; March.  All of a sudden it came back, late June and she passed on July 4th.  I did have time to say goodbye and am so grateful for those final moments.  My boyfriend attended a memorial we held for her at the…

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Added by Lore DeLaire on July 24, 2014 at 8:05am — 2 Comments

New to Legacy.com... available to assist

Greetings!  I frequent these pages of Legacy.com often as I am a Director of Spiritual Care for an Illinois healthcare system.  I have over 25 years of experience in and around the hospice and palliative care sector - in pastoral care and bereavement.  I founded a child/adolescent bereavement camp in South Carolina and currently serve on the Steering/Planning Committee for the International Death, Grief and Bereavement Conference. I am the author of "Spiritual Growth and Healing," available…

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Added by Andrew Vitale, CT on July 23, 2014 at 11:53am — No Comments

Don't Avoid Calling the Bereaved

It happens every time I call the bereaved; they sound dreadful when they answer the phone. When they hear my voice and realize I’m calling to say hello, their tone miraculously changes and their gratitude seems to seep through the phone line.

The fact is, our phones rarely ring…

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Added by Robbie Miller Kaplan on July 23, 2014 at 10:00am — No Comments

When a Former Spouse Dies

I recently received an email from a friend with a link to an obituary. As an obit writer with a deep-but- not-dark interest in both people – dead and alive – and death (until it happens to me), I get these emails all the time. Many of them I’ve written about on a variety of legacy.com pages.

This one however, was unique to me: It was about a former husband of mine who had just died in Houston.

I was not shocked exactly, as I knew he had been in poor health for at least a…

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Added by Susan Soper on July 15, 2014 at 2:09pm — 1 Comment

losing my husband and best friend

On June 26, 2014, I lost my husband, William.  I have never felt so alone in my entire life.  I take it one minute at a time.  Sometimes, that minute seems like an hour.  I know he is in a better place with the Lord now and he is no longer in so much pain.  But, my pain is deep and very real. 

I joined this Grief support group to share and receive information/advice from others that have or is going through what I'm dealing with.  

Added by Cynthia R. Laster on July 15, 2014 at 1:34pm — No Comments

After I Cry

Sometimes I do and sometimes I don’t and sometimes I never know why, but, I

 always feel better after I cry. If I listen to a sad song, I might shed a tear…not

knowing if it is the tune, Or the words that I hear. Or, I might watch a move that tears

at my heart when all of the sudden the tear drops start. Hardly a day ever goes by

that something stupid doesn’t  make me cry. I watch the News Show and someone

dies that I don’t even know, the tears flow. A bird…

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Added by Ken on July 11, 2014 at 2:20am — No Comments

Despair

DESPAIR

A lonely old man just sits in his chair wondering…

What am I doing here?

He has no ambition and he’s got no drive,

just what is it that keeps him alive?

To write down an idea or maybe a thought,

and think to himself….Is this all I’ve got?

Added by Ken on July 11, 2014 at 2:16am — No Comments

Begin With a Sympathy Note

Sympathy notes are not easy to write; it’s difficult to know what you can possibly say to comfort someone who is so profoundly sad. And yet we work hard to write them knowing how important it is to acknowledge a loss and comfort the bereaved.

Despite our efforts to send condolences, it might be a shock to…

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Added by Robbie Miller Kaplan on July 8, 2014 at 2:00pm — No Comments

how do we go on

This is hard to even tell our story but I think it will help to talk about it, so here goes. On may 30th 2014 we dropped my husband  off at work at 7 am , as we're walking out the door to meet him for lunch his mother pulled up to let me know he had passed. At about 10:15. My husband and I have been together for 18 years. We have 4 young children as well as his older three with his ex. I see them all as my children, they have a loving mother,  they have been such a huge part of my life for…

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Added by Bethany Loux on July 3, 2014 at 2:00pm — 3 Comments

Should Out-of-Towners Attend Your Spouse's Funeral or Visit Later?

Q. My husband has been desperately ill for a long time, and I’ve been told it’s only a matter of weeks now. Close friends who live far away have asked whether I prefer they fly in for the funeral – or visit me afterward. They can’t…

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Added by Florence Isaacs on July 2, 2014 at 7:00am — No Comments

Time and Unforseen Occurrence

Some of us may have lost friends or family members in the 911 terrorist  attacks. I lost13 members of my spiritual family... Some may have lost family or friends through some natural disaster like Katrina or the Tsunami in Japan.... ..."time and unforeseen occurrences befall us all ( Ecc 9:11) .......(sigh)

Added by TCGOODWIN on June 29, 2014 at 5:38pm — No Comments

Things to Help Us Cope

 

1) Talk about it- Don't we feel relieve when we talk to someone even if it's a close friend....

2) Write about it-  How wonderful is this website!

3) Pray- (Philippians 4:6,7) You will get a calmness (inner peace) like never before...

Added by TCGOODWIN on June 28, 2014 at 6:55pm — No Comments

Our Dear Friends...They Mean Well

  At times people say the strangest things:

" I know how you feel"

"You need to get over it"

"You can remarry"

"You can have another child"

And sometimes you feel like saying "be quiet!" You do not know how I feel. Just leave me alone! I was encouraged not to take things to heart ( Ecc. 7:21) because I realize that some people just do not know what to say... I realized that I should also not isolate myself (Proverbs 18:1). It could be dangerous.…

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Added by TCGOODWIN on June 27, 2014 at 6:59pm — No Comments

My Story

My name is Chrissie and I am 33 years old. I have a wonderful husband and a beautiful daughter whom I love more than life, but I am struggling everyday to cope with the loss of my baby sister to type 1 diabetes a month ago. You would think that was the end of my troubles, but this is not my first  sibling to die. My baby brother also died seven years ago when he took his own life. I have one sibling left and she is in another state. My late sister Kimberly was only 29 years old and the…

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Added by Christina Hively on June 26, 2014 at 6:13pm — No Comments

My Lucas

I lost my youngest grandson Lucas in April.He choked and was without oxygen too long. He was airlifted to Hershey medical Center. The decision was made to take hum off life support because he would have been a vegetable. He was a beautiful baby. he had blue eyes and blonde hair. He had a disablity and wasn't walking yet.But he was a sweet baby.he was getting theraphy.He loved water.His mommy and daddy miss him alot. It's a helpless feeling because you can't really do anything.The only thing…

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Added by pat Kniss on June 25, 2014 at 11:49am — No Comments

Song "Life Without End At Last"

Can you see with your mind’s eye,

Peoples dwelling together?

Sorrow has passed. Peace at last!

Life without tears or pain.

Sing out with joy of heart!

You too can have a part.

Live for the day when you’ll say,

“Life without end, at last!”

 In those days old will grow young,

Flesh revived as in…

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Added by TCGOODWIN on June 24, 2014 at 3:02pm — No Comments

Encouraging Thought

Now if we face trials, ......and if we are being comforted, it is for your comfort, which acts to help you to endure the same sufferings that we also suffer.
(2 Cor 1:6) Thanks everyone for your encouraging words!

Added by TCGOODWIN on June 23, 2014 at 3:00pm — No Comments

Trends in Mourning Rituals

There was a time when mourning rituals were steeped in etiquette. You knew exactly what to expect and how to demonstrate good manners. But all of that has changed with social media, emails, texts, and ever-evolving…

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Added by Robbie Miller Kaplan on June 23, 2014 at 10:30am — 1 Comment

Warning Signs

Some  of us may have lost one of our love ones from suicide. Here are some warnings signs.

Withdrawal from family and friends/ sleep and eating patterns change/loss of interest in activities they once enjoyed/change  in mood/substance & alcohol abuse/ giving away possessions that are dear to them.........Research shows that 90 percent of suicides are do to mental illness (Ex 34:6)

Added by TCGOODWIN on June 22, 2014 at 8:04am — No Comments

Dear Brothers or Sisters:

  If anyone have lost a sibling in death they may have experienced that people tend to focus more attention to the parents and forget that the siblings are grieving as well, I know they do not mean to, but it happens....Some siblings also have feelings of guilt ....there are many emotions. I was reading something encouraging and it reminded me to Keep a list of comforting thoughts and read them each day PSALMS 94:19

"When anxieties overwhelm me..you comforted and soothed…

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Added by TCGOODWIN on June 21, 2014 at 1:37pm — 1 Comment

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