With Thanksgiving just around the corner, I wanted to share a poem written by Darcie Sims. If you are grieving this holiday season, this poem is for you.



For That, I Am Thankful…

By Darcie Sims



It doesn’t seem to get any better, but it doesn’t get any worse either. 



For that, I am thankful.



There are no more pictures to be…

This is the question that people who attend our grief support groups are asked by their family and friends. They cannot understand why their loved one would want to continue attending a grief support group months or even years following their loss. For those who are part of the group, the answer is simple, “It is like going back to see my family.”



Family – for most, this is the group of people you are born into or marry into. For some, however, a new sort of family is…

On mile 23 my legs were ready to admit defeat. Mentally I was still focused on crossing that finish line, but my body was weary in the heat of the day. Walking 26.2 miles is not an easy feat, especially when you are out of shape and overweight. While I trained for this day, nothing prepares you for the actual event.



By mile 11 I had already learned that mental attitude was far more important than physical training. I witnessed people talk themselves out of the race. “I…

“We are the walking wounded. Our lives are seemingly normal for those looking at us from the outside, but we know differently – for a broken heart doesn’t show from the outside,” said a participant in my grief support group. It is true that life continues following the death of a loved one. Groceries still need to be bought and clothes laundered. Jobs require our attendance and our attention. Little league games, dance recitals, graduations and weddings still take place. For those…

Working with so many people who are grieving, I have come to a conclusion. There are people willing to do the work that it takes to adjust to a life without their loved one and there are people who aren’t. There are people who will remain bitter and angry always. There are people who will cling to the pain of grief and those who will forever identify themselves as “bereaved.” Queen Victoria did. Following the death of her beloved husband, Prince Albert, she wore black every day for…

I recently read a quote from Queen Latifah that said, “I think the most important thing I've learned from the death of my brother, is to not stop living. As my Aunt Elaine says, 'You never get over it but you get through it.' I know for a fact that my brother would not want me to stay right there, stuck in that misery. If the person who you lost loved you like you loved them, there's…

When our loved ones die, we ponder the imponderable. The “whys” and the “what-ifs” consume us at times. We pore over days and decisions in the past that we cannot change. We feel as if the world should stop for a moment to mark the passing of our loved one. We wonder why everyone just seems to be having a normal day when our days are anything but normal. …

Working as director of bereavement support for a group of cemeteries has changed the way I look at life. Each time I am with a family that is experiencing the loss of a loved one, it reminds me to examine how I am living my own life. Socrates wrote, “The unexamined life is not worth living.” He has a point. So I will access my inner philosopher and expound on the virtues…

Everyone wants to be happy. In fact the Declaration of Independence gives Americans the right to pursue happiness. It is not guaranteed, but we can chart our own path to joy. At times when life becomes overwhelming, we may feel stressed and unable to rise to the level of cheerful delight. However we all know people that no matter the circumstances always seem to have a smile on their face and a joie de vivre. How do they get there? How can we achieve this same satisfaction …