I hope you will find comfort and an outlet for your emotions in this post, as I share what it was like as my mother drifted away from leukemia in March 2010. It is excerpted from my book, Navigating Life's Roadways: Stories of Insight from My Odyssey and Inspiration for Your Journey, which I wrote while grieving the loss of my mother. I feel that she is my spiritual co-author, allowing me to birth this work in the midst of those intense emotions of…Continue
"A person who has children does not die." Nigerian proverb
My mother, Mary Parker Brown, passed away in March 2010 at the age of 72 following a nine month battle with leukemia. I do mean battle; she fought with everything she had—grit, will and focused strength. In spite of this disease occupying her body, God had blessed my mother with a sturdy internal and external frame that allowed her to stand against this leveling leukemia for as long as she did.
Added by Deborah Parker on March 11, 2012 at 1:42pm — No Comments
These days that have run together and formed a jagged rip into what I thought was sanity that are running mercilessly together... The hours glaring hard into my being as they pass me by, knowing that I am growing weaker and loosing sight of any glimmer of what I used to think was hope. My soul, my inner self, the place I never knew I could experience such emotion, has been plunged into a place, if you can call it that, that I never knew existed. A place that, honestly, no human being should…Continue
Mother’s can’t deny it: motherhood is truly a satisfying role and many women have said that this is the best job in the world. However, many ambitious, working, entrepreneurial mothers do feel disconnected from their dreams, as they are often overshadowed my maternal obligations and duties. When a mother’s life starts to just become all about her family and children, she loses sight of her own passions and dreams.
Nonetheless, a mom who knows how to follow her dreams and…Continue
Added by Carl Mathis on May 6, 2011 at 6:05pm — No Comments
We know this will be a difficult weekend for many. We wish you all a peaceful, relaxing Mother's Day as you remember your loved ones. For those of you who are grieving the loss of your mother or child, here are a few articles and resources that may help:
As Mother’s Day approaches each year, I begin to hear my mother’s voice. It’s hovering, haunting – cajoling, reminding, prodding. It’s not particularly loving or sweet or nurturing. In fact, it’s pretty direct. Truth be told, it’s constructive criticism – not always welcome but determined to put me on the right path to adulthood.
"Stand up straight,” she would say, echoing what her mother drummed into her. And she absolutely did have me and my sister parading…
Added by Susan Soper on May 6, 2011 at 2:30pm — No Comments
Right on the stiletto heels of spring, eye-popping and heady heights of color and bounce – here comes Mother’s Day!
But for those of us without our mothers, even if you are one, it can feel more like a flat-footed event – particularly as Mother’s Day has gained commercial and emotional momentum over the years.
When my mother died, in 1968 at age 45, Mother’s Day was noted with breakfast in bed or by taking some special chores off her plate or by planting a…
Mother’s Day with my family wasn’t just about Mom. It was about Grandma Linn and Grandma Zurawski, too. Because my grandparents lived at the opposite ends of Chicago, we usually saw Grandma Linn on Saturday and then gathered with the other side of the family and Grandma Zurawski on Sunday. My sister Denise and I often drew cards and pictures for our mom but also for our grandmothers, in particular Grandma Zurawski simply because we saw her more often.
But I didn’t get to know…Continue
My mom and I were extremely close and talked about everything. But we never discussed how I was going to live my life without her. This became abundantly clear in the weeks and months that followed her death; confident and sure-footed me was completely lost.
I couldn’t have imagined all those years ago that I would find joy without her, but I have. She wouldn’t have wanted her death to sap the pleasure from my days and thankfully, it hasn’t.
During my siblings’ annual New Year’s Eve celebration in Bluffton, S.C. several years ago, my brother, Mike, pulled out a tattered, red spiral notebook he had discovered in a box. The distinctive handwriting was unmistakable – our mother’s script, written in a sort of back-slanted, left-handed style unlike any other. The pages were filled with her thoughts, life lessons and musings written about a year before she died at age 45.
My sister Wendy took the notebook…Continue
How will getting organized now benefit you over time, time after time?
When my mother died, I was awash in questions, grief, tasks, decisions—and all of that layered on top of my already-busy life far from Mom’s home. I decided then that I will not put my loved ones through the same ordeal when I die. I went home and…Continue
People express concern in finding the right words to write a truly appropriate condolence note. But it's not your mastery with words that's important; what are truly special are messages that come directly from your heart.
When someone dies, the bereaved are left with their memories. You can add to those memories by sharing your personal thoughts, anecdotes, shared experiences, and remembrances of the deceased. In doing so, you are giving the bereaved a priceless…
Added by Robbie Miller Kaplan on August 13, 2010 at 2:00pm — No Comments
In the scheme of things, we expect to outlive our parents. It is in the natural order that we anticipate that our parents will die before us. And yet it seems that nothing prepares us for the loss – the void we feel following their deaths.
When my last parent died, I felt I had lost my buffer. Without my mom, there was no longer a layer that protected me. When she was alive, no matter what happened or what curve life threw my way, I had someone older and wiser to lean on and learn…
My friend’s dad died several years ago but she thinks of him often; his golf hat and golf clubs are a constant reminder. She stores them where they’re visible and she smiles when she sees them. A cousin wore his dad’s coat the first winter following his father’s death and a friend found great comfort using her mom’s handbag while she grieved her death.
These stories made me think of my grandma. She was constantly in the kitchen and she always wore an apron. I wear an apron…
We had a lot of snow last week, three feet deep. With no place to go, it seemed an opportune time to try my hand at something I’d wanted to do for the last nine years; attempt to make my mom’s stuffed cabbage recipe.
My mom called herself a short order cook and one of her favorite ways to comfort was something homemade from her kitchen. I was a lucky recipient and every time we visited, she prepared three of my favorite recipes. Why would I bother to cook them myself when she was so…
I thought I knew everything there was to know about grief. After all, I’d faced some terrible losses by my early thirties. And yet my mom’s death really shook me. The grief and sense of loss was devastating and I found it incredibly hard to pull myself together that first year.
From my experience, I’ve learned that every loss is different and one loss doesn’t necessarily prepare you for the next. Unlike other life experiences, the more practice you have doesn’t make you any more…
I saw Billy Crystal in his one-man show “700 Sundays” and was deeply touched by his personal story. He relates how his father’s untimely death at age 54, when Crystal was 15, set him apart from his peers and forever changed him. He tells of looking in the mirror shortly after his father’s death and seeing a man instead of a 15-year old.
Crystal’s story resonated with me because I share the same legacy; I was 11-years old when I too lost my 54-year old father. When Crystal relates…
When friends and family faced tough times, my mom knew just what to do. She was a master at doling out comfort and her willingness to listen bonded many friendships. But it was her prowess as a baker that forged relationships. Whether someone was just home from the hospital or grieving a loss, my mom paid a visit, always with something baked from her kitchen.
So it’s no surprise that in the weeks following my mom’s death, I spent countless hours in the kitchen, trying to comfort…
Added by Robbie Miller Kaplan on May 6, 2009 at 7:00am — No Comments