Giving Part of My Personal History a New Home

For as long as I can remember, each time I’ve moved, my high school jean jacket (adorned with several patches on the sleeves) and a formal dress from a high school dance have come with me. I knew I’d never wear the jean jacket again and obviously I’ll never wear the dress again. Actually, I was able to get it on the other day but I couldn’t zip it all the way up– apparently my rib cage has expanded since I was sixteen (I should admit that it’s been over twenty years although it doesn’t feel like it was that long ago).

I offered them to my almost 13-year-old niece/Goddaughter Britt and she immediately wanted them. I wasn’t ready to give them away before. I just kept them with me as if I was waiting for the perfect home. Britt reminds me of myself in many ways. Obviously the time she is growing up in is different from my ‘80s, but I see that she has a sense of style of her own just as I did when I was her age. At almost thirteen, I was probably not as far along in developing mine as she is now but there are definite similarities as I watch her grow into the person she will become.

My mom always says not to get rid of items until we are ready. As she says, we can always get rid of them later but we can’t get them back. I’m glad I held onto these as silly as it seems that the jacket hung in my hall closet and the formal dress in my office closet. The time wasn’t right until this week.

And now, as they sit in a box ready to take a trip to Illinois on Monday to someone I know will appreciate them, I feel good. I can let go of that part of me knowing someone else is going to enjoy a little of my life history.

Michelle Linn-Gust, Ph.D., is an international author and speaker about finding hope after loss and change. She is the author of several books including Rocky Roads: The Journeys of Families through Suicide Grief and Ginger's Gift: Hope and Healing Through Dog Companionship. Her first book, based on the suicide of her younger sister Denise, Do They Have Bad Days in Heaven? Surviving the Suicide Loss of a Si..., inspired siblings around the world in their survival after a loved one’s suicide. She is the President of the American Association of Suicidology and lives in Albuquerque, N.M. Read more about Michelle at www.michellelinngust.com.